BILLY BALLONEY

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Billy Makes Spock Angry

Mr. Balloney used his time traveling device to zoom ahead a few centuries. He had some amazing adventures. One stop was on a star ship called Enterprise.

Spock chocks Billy

Shocking Event Caught on Film

Mr. Balloney was deposited in the ship in a near tragic transporter accident. Seems the transporter was not set properly for the type of plaid Mr. Balloney was wearing. Turns out in the 25th century, plaid had been extinguished as a fashion due to other such accidents.

He met an extraterrestrial name Spock, who supposedly had no emotions. After Spoke demonstrated the so called Vulcan Death Grip to no avail on Mr. Balloney and made a comment about the lack of cerebral activity in Mr. Balloney's head during a Vulcan mind meld, Mr. Balloney demonstrated the Balloney Groin Kick (patent pending) and the usually emotionless Mr. Spock flew into a horrid rage chocking Mr. Balloney.

Transporter accident

Transporter accident involving plaid

At a ship's inquiry, held by Captain James Kirk, it was determined that Mr. Balloney was choked, shaken and made to feel like cheap plastic. His lawyer, Gloria Allready was on hand to state the charges.

Ms. Allready also placed charges of injury to Mr. Balloney's neck. The neck brace shown in one photo is not a result of Mr. Spock's rage, rather the fact that when the star ship goes into warp speed it caused Mr. Balloney to suffer whiplash as there are no head rests on the ship.

Billy in meeting with Kirk, McCoy and Scotty

The Inquiry